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Masked communication occurs when the message is muddied or vague. Communication is direct if the person spoken to is the person for whom the message is intended.
The moment I stopped telling the boys not to watch TV, they started watching TV. I’d resolved not to problem solve, but I still felt compelled to try and get to the bottom of why she was so angry with everyone. The next day, I went into problem-solving mode again. If I let the boys bend the rules on screentime, junk food, and eating in front of the TV, she could retreat to the quiet of our bedroom until the boys were in bed. And that’s how I found myself on the couch with a burger and cartoons.
The moment I stopped telling them not to yell, they yelled. But I was new to this so, instead of approaching with empathy and recognizing her struggle, I came in hot with questions — the shock troops of solution. But the solution permitting a lack of solutions wasn’t good a solution.
Researchers agree that clear, open, and frequent communication is a basic characteristic of a strong, healthy family.
Families that communicate in healthy ways are more capable of problem-solving and tend to be more satisfied with their relationships.
Successful Healthy families periodically take inventory of their strengths and weaknesses and take steps to improve their home and family environment. Bishop, D., Ryan, C., Miller, & Keitner, G., (1993).
Family Problem Solving
Isn¼t it time your family took an inventory of how well it is doing? The Mc Master Model View of Healthy Family Functioning.
Just as effective communication is almost always found in strong, healthy families, poor communication is usually found in unhealthy family relationships.
Marriage and family therapists often report that poor communication is a common complaint of families who are having difficulties. It can lead to numerous family problems, including excessive family conflict, ineffective problem solving, lack of intimacy, and weak emotional bonding.
In Froma Walsh (Eds.), Normal Family Processes (pp.
It wasn’t the gut bomb of a burger I was eating or the frenetic, gross-out antics of B-list DC superheroes that brought me to the realization.